its such a simple question. It was put to me by my nutritionist. She asked me why do I eat. What is it inside of me that makes me eat.

I have been thinking of this a lot. I have managed to change the way i eat and i am getting used to it. but the thing that sits in the back of my mind is why cant i just have that slice of pizza, or a piece of cake, or a lovely cheeseburger.

i think the biggest reason i eat, is because i love food. I love to cook food, i like to look at food (still love watching man v food). i guess also being in travel lets me keep that love of food as i get to travel and try new and different foods.

but other than that i dont know. i know that a lot of its was convienience. A lot of it was just bad judgement. i used to skip meals, eat more than i should of, eat the wrong things (golden nugget burger comes to mind). But i know that all of these things all add up.

but i guess i dont really know the real reason. i guess i need to keep thinking about it…

Well ive been using the fantastic plastic a bit lately and racking up some Frequent Flyer points by booking a whole heap of flying about for myself. In the coming months I am heading to Melbourne, Canberra, Sydney and Cairns. Also heading to the Sunny Coast and possibly the Gold Coast.

Who knows what else will be happening in there. It will be tough on the lifestyle choice (diet, exercise) but I will get through it. I can’t wait to visit my friends in Melbourne and Canberra and catch up with them as I haven’t seen them in soooo long. Missing them heaps!

As for life updates. Im down to 151.8kg… down roughly 20kg in 2 months. A HUGE effort… but i still don’t really see it. Work is turning around, I am back to being a consultant, trying my best to just make sales (although the first month or so will be tough!).

Hopefully everything works out!

I have been so slack…. but life has been so busy lately. Ive been working out twice a day every day since the start of december. Things have been going well, im feeling better and better every day.

Ive lost around 14-15kg so far (not quite sure of an exact amount i can tell you that i have lost 7kg alone since xmas day) and its a bit wierd when my trainer hands me 15kg in weights to hold and says i had been carrying that around and yet, i cant really hold onto it for that long.

Im enjoying the boxing and stuff as its something different. Cardio drives me crazy cause its so booooooring. At least with weights i have to think while im doing it so i dont injure myself, same with boxing.

Thinks keep plodding along and i stick to my diet (its tough at times but i do it), and do my best every time!

Well you have all been supporting me heaps lately and i really do appreciate it. I feel like there are a lot of people behind me with all of this stuff. So on Xmas eve (thursday) my trainer decided to take me out for a walk instead of a gym session. I thought it was a good idea until he told me how far we were going. We were aiming for 7.5k… but if time permitted… 10k… WTF

So Thursday morning I rocked up at the Gym really early and had to get ready for a long long walk. We walked all along the river from Tenneriffe to almost the story bridge and back again. I was expecting just 10k but we actually walked 11k. It was a tough thing for me however it brings me half way to my first goal. I want to be able to do a 10k run. However before i can do a 10k run i need to be able to not fall over in that distance. So i feel good that i can walk 10k at least without dying. Hell up until then i hadn’t really been doing much more than 2.5k in one session.

Since then i have done 2 days of 7.5k walks. And still several more till i go back to the gym on the 4th. The other challenge my PT set for me is a 12k walk some time during the xmas break. So I am going to do this on the morning on NYE. So if anyone wants to come help me get through this i would love the company. Walking on my own is BOOOOOOOOOORING!.

So if your interested send me a message, probably going to walk early morning on the 31st along the Kedron Brook Bikeway. Please come help support me, you dont need to walk, you can run, jog, ride or skate hell, you can walk on your hands if you want. But i just want some company.

well… i have finally come to my first hurdle. It just happens to be about something that is close to me. Food.

So i saw a nutritionist on friday and she is pretty cool (she actually works with “The Biggest Loser”) but the thing is, I am starting to feel really restricted in what I can and can’t eat. I know i hear people say it all the time “but its good for you” but the thing is, it feels like im giving up so much to do this.

I know i need to eat better etc and i need to change the way I eat, but do i really need to give up the foods that I love. Im not talking chocolate or anything like that? but surely i can make a pizza out of this because that would seriously make me happy right about now? maybe ill look into it and come out successful somehow!. I dunno!

I do enjoy some of the foods that i have been able to eat, but seriously, its like the same thing over and over again. I am really starting to get bored and for me thats not a good thing!

If anyone has any REALLY healthy recipes please email them to me… i am desperate!

So… its now been 2 weeks since ive started at the Gym. last tuesday was my first session. Things are totally different with me. My outlook on life has changed, ive started eating right and started to try and be a better person all around. Over the last two weeks i have had to slowly let out information about what I am doing etc as people are going to start to notice changes in me. So I have started a new category called “New Mal” and I have decided to not protect this.

I can’t hide this all now, everyone needs to see it. So with that in mind i can give you some updates on what I have been doing at the Gym. I have been working with a Personal Trainer for 2 weeks now. 5 Days a week. Its been hard but then so is life. So i have started to keep a little mantra in my life. “The Only Easy Day Was Yesterday” I came across this mantra a few years ago while reading a book about Navy Seal Training. They get put through hell and this is drilled into them that the only easy day in life was yesterday. You go into every day knowing that there will be challenges ahead and you do it without knowing what is going to happen. All you know is that it will be hard but you can get through it.

So with my new mantra in life i push forward with it. I do everything the trainers ask. I feel like a cop out if i don’t. I feel like im letting myself down. I have always been my strongest critic and I am sure this will never change. To give you an idea of what the trainers have been doing with me I do weights twice a week along with cardio every day. I have been doing double daily sessions of exercise so I will go to the gym of a morning (on weekends its more time on the treadmill at home or a walk around the neighbourhood). In the evenings it is treadmill time at home. I have been doing 2k sessions every day lately and been pushing the time down and down each time. Tonight I started 2.5k on the treadmill with a nice time of 33:30 to get myself started. My fastest 2k walk so far was this morning on the Boardwalk at Tenneriffe. 21:42. The trainers are awesomely proud that i have committed myself to this and been working super hard.

So many people at work have also been telling me they are proud of what I hav been doing and what is going to change in my life, and i have never really thought that so many people cared. I am really pleased that they do, it means a lot!

So with this i also give you that tommorrow night, the Work xmas party will probably be my last drinks for quite some time. I am not sure if I will ever take drinking back up (if i do it wont be to the same level I was before). So tommorrow night, I will have a few drinks for the last time for who knows how long.

Its a bit early to be talking like its a New Years resolution but today was the beginning of a new step down my life.

Im fast approaching 30, i live at home still (sad i know) and im still single. Its about time i started to do something about all of this. Tommorrow i start down a new path. Tommorrow i have my first personal training session. I am working towards some goals:

I wanna Weigh 100kg
I wanna have some decent arm strength
I want to be able to do a 10km run (this is my big goal)
I want to do kokoda (in 2011 at the moment for me)

So tommorrow morning at 630am I am going to try and and get all of this negativity out of my life, and keep things going. To work towards my new goals. Im also considering seeing a counsellor. I have had some rough times in my life lately. With massive meltdowns in the last few months before i went away. If I am going to get myself physically healthy, i should probably get myself mentally healthy to. It may help!

So tommorrow is a new beginning… one step forward in my life